The Power of Stopping

Over the years I have had the opportunity to attend mostly silent retreats. I have benefited greatly from being unplugged! It’s amazing how liberating it can be to be device free. In this world full of twenty-four hour information and an endless news cycle I find it necessary to build some solitude into my day. I realize how fortunate I am to be able to do this.

 Here’s a little background on me: I am a long time meditation practitioner. I got initiated into Transcendental Meditation at the age of fifteen. I honestly think my very Catholic parents thought I was joining a cult! My Mom, always the avid reader, read Howard Benson’s, The Relaxation Response, and decided it would be OK. I got a mantra that I was told was specifically chosen for me. I was special, until my older brother saw all or many of the mantras published in the Boston Globe! I was crestfallen, however I persevered with my practice for decades. I think I actually used the time to disassociate, rather than engage in being present to the moment.

For me, my profession of massage therapy lends itself to introspection, seeking, self discovery and being of service. I have been a long time admirer of Zen Master, Thich Nhat Hanh. I read his seminal book, Peace is Every Step, decades ago. Through the instruction in that book I learned helpful tools to create awareness in my day. For example, if I am at a red traffic light, I can take the opportunity to breathe three times. When I moved my residence, I discovered a Sangha (meditation community) that practices in his tradition of Engaged Buddhism very close to my home. One of the things I learned early on is that I didn’t have to become a Buddhist to benefit from the practice. The tools of the practice have assisted me in shining the light of awareness on my habitual energies. I benefit from the collective wisdom of the group as well, and the teachings of the Buddha as interpreted by Thich Nhat Hanh. I was fortunate to have a wonderful Dharma Teacher, the late Joanne Friday, whose transmission of the teachings has been so valuable. I’ve learned to look deeply so I don’t create any more suffering for myself or others. I must say it’s a deep practice and I do it most imperfectly!

Stopping helps me see how habitual most of my behaviors are. I have the capacity to develop more beneficial habits. Over the years I’ve learned not to turn on the radio for the first five minutes of my commute. I sometimes didn’t turn on the car radio at all. My daily meditation practice and participation in The Rhode Island Community of Mindfulness serve as reminders that I can build helpful gaps in my days. I notice where I get caught in entanglements, and I can pause and ask myself, “Do you really want to go there?’ My practice helps me understand that I can be compassionate without losing myself in the difficulties that life and its many challenges present.

If you would like to know more about the meditation I practice here are some links: 

• Rhode Island Community of Mindfulness

• Plum Village

• BLUE CLIFF MONASTERY